Jeremy: [picking up a box of tissues from Mark’s shopping trolley] Look at us, people are going to think we spend the whole time w*nking!

Mark: Don’t be ridiculous. They’re homey. They’re for wiping up mess.

Jeremy: Yeah, man mess. Why do you think they’re called Man-Size?

Mark: They’re for men. Men’s noses. Big manly snot.

The legacy of Kleenex Mansize tissues isn’t one often sought after as, to most, they come off slightly sexist and weird.

The term ‘toxic masculinity’ is often thrown around too often, but it does really come into its own when you consider some men genuinely believe that they need bigger and stronger tissues than women when they have a sneeze coming on. Kleenex obliged unquestionably.

This kind of marketing has been no stranger to us, as Yorkie used to explicitly say that their nasty chocolate wasn’t for women, and McCoy’s proudly purveyed “MAN CRISPS”. Both of these ploys faded away with little fanfare – which was probably clever on their parts – but Kleenex dug their heels in and continued to stock shelves with Mansize tissues.

That is until now.

Kleenex have announced that they’re renaming the Mansize genre of tissues to “extra-large”. What the hell does that mean?! Who are they for?

Men will wander the streets aimlessly, looking for something suitable to wipe their noses with. That dog over there? A car engine? Nothing will do. Naturally this is going to cause some distress but what are us men going to wipe are wet and weary eyes with? Only god knows, but he can’t help us now.

The change came due to customer feedback and honestly, I’m surprised Mansize tissues lasted this long. It’s 2018 and finally my mum can no longer be arrested for buying them with full intent to use them herself. You’re safe, mum. Come out of the shadows.

The news came after one women tweeted:

To which Kleenex replied:

Thank you for sharing your concern. We recently made changes to our Mansize branding and will now be labeled Extra Large, keep an eye out in shops.

It’s not clear when the new branded will kick in, but it’s soon.

Mansize changing to Extra-Large isn’t going to change the world – of course it’s not – but it’s a step in the right direction; like Gay Pride flags appearing in the new Spider-Man game and the like.

In similar news (thematically, anyway (this one’s about sandwiches)), Amy Lamé, who works for the Mayor of London, was appalled by a sandwich available at Waitrose, named the ‘Gentleman’s Smoked Chicken Caesar Roll’ . She tweeted:

I never knew sandwiches were gender specific. I’m female but thankfully Waitrose let me purchase this anyway.

This kicked up one hell of a fuss and a Waitrose spokesperson eventually came out and said:

It’s never our intention to cause offence – we’re not dictating who should eat this sandwich – we hope anyone who tries it will love the distinctive flavours. However we are planning to change the name of the sandwich soon.

Casually sexist tissues and sandwiches. It’s been a funny old year.

Images via Waitrose, Getty. Kleenex